tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-75497040220735449302024-02-07T06:16:36.693-05:00New York LoveSashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.comBlogger162125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-7995651396788307662017-02-11T01:02:00.000-05:002017-02-11T12:49:40.622-05:00Time to Say Good Bye<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Nite lovers,<br />
<br />
It's been quite a journey, and you all know as anything else in life there is a progressional ending to everything. Nothing can remain, nothing can stay the same. Things change, we change, life keeps unfolding. That's certain. That's what makes us keep going.<br />
<br />
So it's with the most sadness I must say good bye to you and to this beautiful project I created, my blog New York Love.<br />
I started it at a time when nothing made sense, when things were just happening to me, when I didn't know what the hell would happen to me and my life. All I knew that with creative outlet (blog!) I would be able to connect to my higher self and find some answers. At least one answer that would help me out of this mess, the mess I was in at the moment. The moment of stillness, after all relationships that took place in a span of all my 20s, career taking precedence, not knowing what should be the focus. All I knew that there was so much more and there was nowhere I needed to go. All I had to do is look inside, go deeper and keep going. And that's what I did.<br />
<br />
I went in, I went out. I still had occasional encounters, I let them go easier every time, I got more into getting deeper inside myself. And then the most amazing thing happened, I found the answer I had been searching for all my life. I found the presence of Me. I found myself. It was big.<br />
The search was over, I felt complete, I was at peace. Desire of having someone else in my life was replaced with desire of sharing my newly discovered unending source of love. I was overflowing. I felt whole for the first time in my life.<br />
<br />
And that's when I met the man who would become the partner for life. Our relationship unfolded, it went through cycles and eventually it blossomed into an agreeable union of marriage.<br />
Yes, we got married. and what a wedding that was..... The best one I'd ever been to or imagined.<br />
<br />
I am happy and there are some things I wanted to share:<br />
<br />
1) All 20 year olds who think that there is just no guy out there for them: Don't despair, it's just not your time. You have bigger things to do right now, so focus on them. When the time is right (for you) that love will come around. Just trust the Universe and yourself. Focus on what you can and want to do: your career, your personal growth and development.<br />
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2) All 30 year olds: So you are 30 now, and your skin is just as great if not better than when you were in your 20s. This is enough to celebrate. Don't you see that we become more beautiful as soon as we turn 30 and especially 32!! So please just fall in love with yourself. with your fucking fabulous self! This is the time. You are the best goddess you ever met and would love to spend the rest of your life with. So don't reserve yourself, go for it, accept this love and find your bliss. And then if it's your intention, welcome another soul to share this love with.<br />
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3) For women in their 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80, 90s, 100s: I am not there yet, but I will be one day. And I am excited for what I am seeing, you are fabulous and you inspire me. All I know is that we get better as we go, and getting to 100s will probably be the best years yet! For now, I am grateful and excited to go with life and trust the Universe, it's always had my back.<br />
<br />
So I am saying good bye to the blog and all of you and hoping that we will meet again. And it will be anticipated and inspired. And we will be different but still us, just being ready for something new to come, for something new to learn. And that's how life goes...<br />
<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-11717976871097421892016-08-21T01:20:00.000-04:002016-08-21T01:20:10.345-04:00Update - August 21st, 2016<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Right after I published my Quote post I wanted to send a quick update on my life.<br />
<br />
Would you believe me if I said it's the best time of my life now? <br />
It is. I'm at peace with practically everything that's happening to me right now. Let me tell you being at peace with everything is key to happiness.<br />
It took years of work to get here but I am here.<br />
<br />
I have a great job with people I identify with. I have a bigger plan for my next career, the purpose of my life to be precise.<br />
My friendships have gone through transformations, some had to go, some developed, and some entered. <br />
I've learned how to say No, and am very proud of that accomplishment.<br />
I've traveled a lot, seen new and familiar places. This year, I've been on the road every month, if not every other weekend. Yes, I get tired but the experiences are rewarding.<br />
I've fallen in love with my kitty Josephine even more and learned how amazing unconditional love could be.<br />
I've embraced my feminine nature and let it guide me every step of the way (more on that to follow).<br />
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But most importantly, I got engaged to the man I love. He's the love of my life and I couldn't be happier marrying and spending the rest of our lives together.<br />
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Mission accomplished. I found love in New York City and love found me. The single gal's life was amazing but being in a loving relationship is so much more. I'll quote Moneypenny from James Bond's "Spectre" (and one of my favorite quote's now): "It's called Life, James. you should try it".<br />
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So that's my advice to you: Try it. Open your heart to love and be amazed.<br />
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Good nite lovers. I'll be in touch.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-57831067772734203972016-08-21T00:39:00.001-04:002016-08-21T13:06:20.914-04:00Bonjour<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I know it's been ages since I visited my blog but the most wonderful thing happened to me yesterday.<br />
I was visited by my quote muse. What a sweet reunion that was, we missed each other dearly. <br />
<br />
Here's what she whispered in her sweetest voice to my grateful heart:<br />
<br />
1) There is no black or white. Every situation requires a unique approach.<br />
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2) Sometimes a solution to a problem is realizing that none is needed.<br />
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3) One learns about oneself through others. Everyone can be an angel in their own company. It's relationships with others that unravel our deepest truths.<br />
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4) One of the best things that comes with age is learning one's own boundaries. Another is respecting them.<br />
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5) Neither trusting nor distrusting people will save us from disappointment. Accepting will do the trick.<br />
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6) It's not about promises, it's about commitments.<br />
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7) Imbalance is at the root of every issue.<br />
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8) Nature heals. I don't need Xanax, an hour in the park will do.<br />
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I know she (muse) is here now, and we're going to have the best time re-connecting.<br />
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Cheers.<br />
<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-14600086651223811722016-04-03T20:59:00.002-04:002016-04-03T20:59:53.525-04:00Art of Allowing<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers.<br />
<br />
It's been a very long time since I wrote on here. Some of you might be wondering whether I dropped off the face of the Earth..<br />
The path to authenticity has become a real journey and so many roads and crossroads came across in order to find the way. Almost as if the Universe was just waiting for me to say Ok, I'm ready and started opening doors with new ideas and perceptions. In short, Summer has been busy. I traveled to Europe, I reconnected with the family (especially my parents), I connected to my roots with true appreciation this time. Since I was used to having some kind of apprehension to my motherland it was truly liberating to see its beauty and wholeness. I never felt so much gratitude and love for my birth country.<br />
As soon as got back to NY, life started shifting to the whole new horizon. I got a new job, which will start next Tuesday. For the last month, I knew I would be leaving the place I worked at in the last 4.5 years. All kinds of emotions were storming through my head and heart. I felt sad, nostalgic, then happy and excited, then scared, terrified and guilty for leaving. Seriously, I never had so many complex emotions leaving a job before. The place grew on me, the people I worked with and friends I made there intertwined with my life. It was a community I belonged to, at the same time the place I worked at the longest, the time I embarked on self-journey, fell in love with myself, fell in love with another. Symbolically it was my sun shining upon my life, letting things grow. I was able to take care of my personal life, explore unfamiliar pastures in some respect.<br />
On a less brighter side, I got too comfortable and reliant on things to remain the same to sustain the vacuum we all had created to keep the real world at bay. Then things started to change, departments started being outsources, the staff started turning over, old people leaving, new people coming. It's with greatest sadness I'm sharing here that Joyce, beloved by everyone whoever met her and heard her laugh on the 6th floor, passed away from battling cancer in a short 5 months. Then when our big boss was forced to retire, I knew that there was no return and I'd better get in a flow of all those changes. The job just fell into my lap as soon as I came to that conclusion. It happened so fast and almost automatic, instead of being excited I started panicking about upcoming changes. I found myself holding on to the way things were, creating resistance to the change. Not surprisingly, people in the office didn't take news about my departure with an anticipated glee, I even started getting a cold shoulder from some I used to be close to. Let me tell you if there is an emotion that can overtake your whole being and cripple you to a halt it is most certainly Guilt. I started feeling guilty, which of course, became a host of many other "sister" emotions, such as defensiveness, biased justification, blame.<br />
Deep inside I knew I needed to release, let go. Seriously, lovers, why is it so hard sometime to just simply let go? Even when you are completely aware that this is the best (and only) solution there is. Still you spend just enough time in this fermenting concoction to a point that the cork will pop up splattering all around. Or even worse, not being able to come out, being stuck in a forever fermenting state that will make you stale and impossible to taste in the end.<br />
<br />
Unfinished... October 10, 2015</div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-31006497203855215172016-04-03T20:32:00.001-04:002016-04-03T20:32:38.623-04:00Peeling away layers<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
It's been awhile since I wrote here. It's been more of a journal writing for me these days. Summer was eventful; I traveled, I met with old friends, I made new ones, reconnected with the family. Overall it's been a very social time for me, and I enjoyed it more than an independent New Yorker would allow.<br />
<br />
My path to authenticity has been going through the phase of peeling away layers. All those masks and layers I'd accumulated to fit in, to be accepted, to be "one of us". How many of them have I been carrying wrapped around my soul, a multitude of layers so thick that the voice of my soul got lost and stranded before it could find its way back. No wonder, I've been lost all these years.<br />
<br />
I knew a lot needed to be shed. I started with the top layers, and one by one they began to peel away. Let me tell you it's a painful process. Those layers get ingrained, deep rooted. Peeling them away is like waxing the most sensitive parts of our bodies. Naturally, tears started flowing.<br />
<br />
Yes, those truthful crocodile tears running down your cheeks fast, then turning to loud sobbing, then back to crying, and so on till there is no water left.<br />
<br />
Dated back in Sept 2015</div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-85458819774925969832015-07-29T12:10:00.000-04:002015-07-29T12:10:03.761-04:00Path to Authenticity<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Can we honestly say that we know who we truly are? Strip away titles, names, "hats", labels, signs, perceptions of others, our own perceptions, assigned traits and norms. What do you see? Do you see the true self that came to this world to explore and expand? Can you feel the one whose heart's beating to its own rhythm? Can you hear the one whose voice's coming from her soul? Can you see the one whose light's shining through?<br />
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How often do we stop and ask "Who Am I?" How often do we find time in our technology-powered society to sit down, unplug and ask the most basic question that brought us here to this physical world? Do we question our actions, thoughts and feelings to see if they are aligned with who we are?<br />
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Granted what's happening in the world, we don't. Otherwise we wouldn't have so much suffering. If we truly knew who we were would we ever be anything than happy doing the things we love and letting others pursue their passions? Imagine a world of happy people doing what they love, following their truth, letting others follow theirs.<br />
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If we knew who we truly were, we would be aligned with our inner selves and there would be no reason to resist anything that came to us. As a result there would be no pain, no suffering. For we would be in the flow, joyfully traveling our path of life.<br />
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Do we remember the moment we stopped accepting ourselves and turned to a deceptively safe but dangerous layering to fit in? Before we are out of the parental home's door, we are conditioned and layered with forms and norms so that we could function in the "real" world and follow the path laid out for us. By the time we've loved and lost, our layers had become our second nature. We get lost, disappointed with our life choices, careers, paths, friends, partners, places. Deep down we know something is missing. So we start searching for IT, not even fully understanding what it is we are looking for.. Happiness, love, money, fame, safety?<br />
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What we are looking for is ourselves. We are yearning to know who we are, for we know that we are all unique and special. It's peeling away layers and diving deep that we are aching for. The layers are weighing us down and with each new layer it's harder to walk, until we halt and can't make another step. That's when we need to start peeling away all those layers, one by one. We peel away one layer and we already can make one step, then peel away another and another step. And so until we are completely free and walking in our own truth freely and effortlessly.<br />
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How do we peel away the layers you'll ask?<br />
By making it an intention. By asking questions. By sitting down in meditation and listening to our inner voice, by becoming friends with that voice and letting it guide us in the outside world. By willing to say good bye to old beliefs and perceptions. By undoing. By letting go.<br />
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It's not an easy beginning. It could be very painful to lose the comfort of the layers. Attachments are hard to lose. But once we start seeing the light and feel the lightness we realize it was well worth it. And there is no way back. It's the journey that keeps on unfolding, that keeps us going.<br />
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And so I started my own process of peeling away the layers. Intention to do so revealed how many I'd acquired over the years. How I forgot who I was. Every time I sit in meditation I am revealed with yet another layer that covered my true self to "survive", to fit in. With tears of joy and sadness I am peeling them away one by one. I've got many more to go but with each one it's getting easier and easier. I already walk albeit shaky. But I am walking and it's getting lighter with each step. Sadness of losing the layers is replaced with joy of coming home. It's the most exhilarating and fulfilling journey I've ever taken.<br />
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Stay tuned to hear more and get inspired to start your own journey.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-20196861766297316202015-06-09T15:57:00.002-04:002015-06-09T16:10:17.334-04:00Soulmates - Foulmates?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers all,<br />
<br />
Today I received an article on soulmates, a concept I was very much interested in during 2010-2012. In fact, so interested that I was determined to meet my soulmate and never settle for anything else. I did meet my "soulmate" or so I thought in 2010. As I found out later he was a wolf in sheep's clothing. And after our painful breakup in 2012, I completely abandoned a concept of soulmates. I'd had enough.<br />
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It's now been over 3 years, and the subject never came up, at least I myself never revisited it. With all honesty, it never even crossed my mind. That is until today when an article on the matter showed up in my mailbox. How could it be I thought, a concept of soulmates was so last year?...<br />
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The article itself and many many readers' comments were positively affirming that soulmate connections are real. They are a pinnacle of relationships, especially romantic ones. And in order to be happy, we all should aspire to wait till that one and only walks into our life and make us whole.<br />
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For a moment I got excited again. My Piscean nature, can't help but get excited about such romantic notions. But years of my personal experience and extensive research in this area evoked a voice of reason. Logically, the concept makes no sense.<br />
The only authentic soulmate connection is the one we have with our own soul and its Divine Source, God if you will. And it's the only connection we need to restore to feel complete.<br />
The concept of someone else making us feel complete is dangerous and degrading in nature. It stops one from finding or simply unleashing completeness one already has within. What scares us is that internal work that requires deep diving into one's own soul, raw, open, unprotected. It scares most of us so much, that we'd rather wait till we meet that special someone who would fill our void. We avoid being alone, we are scared to sit still with our eyes closed. We are terrified to look inside and discover that it's all already there. It can't be so simple romantic minds will exclaim. It's too primitive for my romantic soul! A notion of being incomplete and a soulmate who is the other half sounds so much more exciting. So much more human.<br />
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The truth is we all have God/Goddesses in us. We All hold love that transcends body and mind. We are love. Once we realize and connect with it within we'll start noticing that, in fact, we are all soulmates for we are all a part of this energy that is the source of it all. And it's only due to the level of this awareness among humans that makes us feel closer to some people and less so to other.<br />
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Out of curiosity, I reached out to 10 friends of mine on that matter. Most of them responded and 80% responded negatively. One of them even sent me a picture of a huge shoe closet that I am sure could be for many New York girls their perfect soulmate (considering the space scarcity and all). One of them believed in a concept but never experienced it herself. Just like we believe in ghosts I suppose, they are as real as we would like them to be. And only 2 (a man and a woman, unrelated) affirmatively responded that not only did they believe in soulmates, they actually met them. However, when it came to explaining what it meant to them, their soulmates sounded more like people who influenced their lives at certain point in their lives. In that case, I could undoubtedly claim Mike Bloomberg my soulmate for making me quit smoking by banning it inside New York bars. I am forever grateful to him for that.<br />
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On a serious note, I am happy that it's not 2010 and I am no longer waiting for that one and only to walk into my life and make me complete. I am in 2015, and feel as complete as one should be. And if I crave a higher connection with like-minded individuals, I get together with my girls!<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-59110559806379470112015-05-25T07:25:00.004-04:002015-05-28T16:01:16.162-04:00Life's little moments<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers all,<br />
<br />
I am writing to you on this Monday morning from Vieques, Puerto Rico. It's now, almost at the end of my vacation, that I felt compelled to drop a few lines.<br />
Lessons I learned from visiting this beautiful island (San Juan and Vieques):<br />
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1) Expect the unexpected. From the beginning of this trip I was consistently surprised (in a positive and not so positive way and they are both valuable). From federal crime arrest at the airport in front of my eyes, to portioned distribution of water in San Juan due to current draught (once I even had to wash myself with water from a bucket); from joy to sadness; from feeling welcomed to unappreciated. I experienced many more emotions and feelings than I expected. That's why we need to travel, that's why we need to put ourselves in new situations, that's why we need to meet new people and learn about others.<br />
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2) Kindness is universal. I am one of those cheery New Yorkers who believe (truly! believe) that we New Yorkers are a kind bunch, even if it doesn't seem that way to an outside observer. We have big apple hearts. And yet, I am always amazed how kind people are when I go somewhere else. I didn't know Puerto Ricans in NY. Here, I meet people of different nationalities and every single one has a smile on their face. I see kindness. I feel kindness. From the hosts who brought me a bucket of water, to the neighbor who lent me her iPhone charger. Form the tour guide who showed me constellations in the sky to the car driver who went out of his way to bring me back home.<br />
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3) Nature is our joy and responsibility. I've seen beautiful beaches, and lush gardens. But mostly I see people loving and enjoying their nature. From the youngsters jumping and playing in the ocean at the sunset, to the owner surfing with his dog. From my hostess in Vieques tending to her 50 plus plants and trees to the Bio Bay tour guides being a watchdog of this precious natural preserve. People don't act here as if nature is here to serve them. It's the other way around. Nature is a gift that is enjoyed and protected.<br />
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4) Appreciate other's space. Not pushing your agenda on anyone, even if it comes from heart. We are all different and have a different definition of practically anything in this world. It's our awareness that lets us see another as they are and not how we want to see them. Respect their views and decisions. Seeing namaste in each one of us. Something we learn every day, all life long.<br />
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5) Feeling close even as distance gets longer. Sometimes we need distance to start feeling close to someone we lost closeness with. Being away helps us become aware and start seeing things for what they are. We can discern our emotions from facts, and look at the situation as an observer. If closeness was lost because of unmet expectations it can be re-gained back from seeing it at a distance. Love transcends time and space.<br />
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6) Establishing your boundaries. Applies as to oneself as to others.<br />
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7) Explore. Have an open mind. Be flexible. Abandon your rigid ways. Become multi-dimensional.<br />
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8) Be still. Do nothing. Be present. Be aware.<br />
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9) Take time to digest all of the experiences. Become a student of life. Lessons are in every moment; see them, accept them. Let yourself grow.<br />
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That's all for now my dear readers. I am going to seize the moment and hitch hike to one of the 40 plus beaches. Life is indeed beautiful when we see it. </div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-25548996873755126622015-05-14T11:11:00.000-04:002015-05-14T11:16:33.532-04:00Seize the Day<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I seized the day this week. It was Tuesday.<br />
Nature was calling, and I followed it.<br />
<br />
That's what happens when a woman starts getting back to her wild nature. There is no way back. You start hearing instinctual voices, and you need to follow for they are loud, ever commanding. There is just no other way. The soul will leap at any opportunity to follow nature's call. The body will get ready like a panther before her jump, the whistle goes and off she goes running wild and free. The hair flying like wings of an eagle. Nothing can stop a wild woman.<br />
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Of course, it wasn't as dramatic as it sounds above, I am just experimenting with my poetic bone here:)<br />
In truth, after 2 days of severe allergy attacks (New Yorkers' ordeal in midst of May), I needed to get out of the concrete jungle for a day. Long Beach is my quickest and most reliable escape, the place I almost moved to 2.5 years ago (you can read about this in my other posts labeled Sandy). The place I found myself, my self-love.<br />
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Every trip there is filled with magical anticipation, as if something long forgotten will be revealed once again. Is it mine going back to mother nature? or is it mine running away from the matrix of New York city and society? could it be something I experienced long time before I had forgotten? Is it close to tasting of what heaven on Earth could feel like? It's probably all those things and more, so much more. The place is magical to me. As soon as I step my foot out of the train, I feel connected, I feel myself. Walking to the beach, I already feel ocean breeze, and salty wind stripping me off of all the layers I'd piled on in NY. I feel lighter by each step. Soon so light, I might fly. <br />
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I take my sandals off as soon as I get closer. I'm smiling from my heart. My bones want to sing. The sand, the water, the wind, they are embracing. I am a child in my mother's womb again. Nothing bad could ever happen. I am safe and protected. I am free. I am me. <br />
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My heart, my mind and my soul are rested. This is a magical time they are completely aligned and are in perfect harmony. For there is no other place they would rather be.<br />
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Coming back to the city I bring a little piece of magic with me, it flies from my beachy hair and tanned skin. I am glowing. I just experienced the essence of my whole being.<br />
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Oh how I love this.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-69170671934170609612015-04-30T14:13:00.000-04:002015-04-30T14:14:12.189-04:00Women Who Run With the Wolves<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
I started reading my favorite book again on the subject "Women Who Run With the Wolves" by Clariss Pinkola Estes. It's that good. If you haven't read it yet, don't waste another second, go on Amazon and buy it right now. This is my bible, and literally is always on my night stand by the bed. When I have kids (and I will!) I'll make a home course based on this book. Whether I'll have sons or daughters, they will have to study this book from cover to cover. Do I need to prove more how important this book is???<br />
<br />
Below are just some of the quotes I found online. I can't read this book without a pen, it's underlined almost on every page.<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“Sometimes the one who is running from the Life/Death/Life nature insists on thinking of love as a boon only. Yet love in its fullest form is a series of deaths and rebirths. We let go of one phase, one aspect of love, and enter another. Passion dies and is brought back. Pain is chased away and surfaces another time. To love means to embrace and at the same time to withstand many endings, and many many beginnings- all in the same relationship.” </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">― </span><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/901977.Clarissa_Pinkola_Est_s" style="background-color: white; color: #666600; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none;">Clarissa Pinkola Estés</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">, </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/981745" style="color: #666600; text-decoration: none;">Women Who Run With the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype</a></i><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“It is worse to stay where one does not belong at all than to wander about lost for a while and looking for the psychic and soulful kinship one requires” </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">― </span><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/901977.Clarissa_Pinkola_Est_s" style="background-color: white; color: #666600; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none;">Clarissa Pinkola Estés</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">, </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/981745" style="color: #666600; text-decoration: none;">Women Who Run With the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype</a></i><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“Having a lover/friend who regards you as a living growing criatura, being, just as much as the tree from the ground, or a ficus in the house, or a rose garden out in the side yard... having a lover and friends who look at you as a true living breathing entity, one that is human but made of very fine and moist and magical things as well... a lover and friends who support the ciatura in you... these are the people you are looking for. They will be the friends of your soul for life. Mindful choosing of friends and lovers, not to mention teachers, is critical to remaining conscious, remaining intuitive, remaining in charge of the fiery light that sees and knows.” </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“The way to maintain one's connection to the wild is to ask yourself what it is that you want. This is the sorting of the seed from the dirt. One of the most important discriminations we can make in this matter is the difference between things that beckon to us and things that call from our souls.</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">Nowhere can this be seen more clearly than in the choice of mates and lovers. A lover cannot be chosen a la smorgasbord. A lover has to be chosen from soul-craving. To choose just because something mouthwatering stands before you will never satisfy the hunger of the soul-self. And that is what the intuition is for; it is the direct messenger of the soul.” </span><br />
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<i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"></i>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“When seeking guidance, don't ever listen to the tiny-hearted. Be kind to them, heap them with blessing, cajole them, but do not follow their advice.” </span><br />
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<i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"></i>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“The psyches and souls of women also have their own cycles and seasons of doing and solitude, running and staying, being involved and being removed, questing and resting, creating and incubating, being of the world and returning to the soul-place.” </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“Though fairy tales end after ten pages, our lives do not. We are multi-volume sets. In our lives, even though one episode amounts to a crash and burn, there is always another episode awaiting us and then another. There are always more opportunities to get it right, to fashion our lives in the ways we deserve to have them. Don't waste your time hating a failure. Failure is a greater teacher than success.” </span><br />
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<i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"></i><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“The doors to the world of the wild Self are few but precious. If you have a deep scar, that is a door, if you have an old, old story, that is a door. If you love the sky and the water so much you almost cannot bear it, that is a door. If you yearn for a deeper life, a full life, a sane life, that is a door.” </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">"The answer is an inequivocal yes. So why, if this is all so and too true, do women keep trying to bend and fold themselves into shapes that are not theirs? I must say, from years of clinical observation of this problem, that most of the time it is not because of deep-seated masochism or a malignant dedication to self-destruction or anything of that nature. More often it is because the woman simply doesn't know any better. She is unmothered.”</span><br />
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“In mythos and fairy tales, deities and other great spirits test the hearts of humans by showing up in various forms that disguise their divinity. They show up in robes, rags, silver sashes, or with muddy feet. They show up with skin dark as old wood, or in scales made of rose petal, as a frail child, as a lime-yellow old woman, as a man who cannot speak, or as an animal who can. The great powers are testing to see if humans have yet learned to recognize the greatness of soul in all its varying forms.”<br />
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“Asking the proper question is the central action of transformation- in fairy tales, in analysis, and in individuation. The key question causes germination of consciousness. The properly shaped question always emanates from an essential curiosity about what stands behind. Questions are the keys that cause the secret doors of the psyche to swing open.”<br />
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“we all begin the process before we are ready, before we are strong enough, before we know enough; we begin a dialogue with thoughts and feelings that both tickle and thunder within us. We respond before we know how to speak the language, before we know all the answers, and before we know exactly to whom we are speaking.”<br />
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“Go out in the woods, go out. If you don't go out in the woods nothing will ever happen and your life will never begin.”<br />
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“Bone by bone, hair by hair, Wild Woman comes back. Through night dreams, through events half understood and half remembered...”<br />
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“All the "not readies," all the "I need time," are understandable, but only for a short while. The truth is that there is never a "completely ready," there is never a really "right time."<br />
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As with any descent to the unconscious, there comes a time when one simply hopes for the best, pinches one's nose, and jumps into the abyss. If this were not so, we would not have needed to create the words heroine, hero, or courage.”<br />
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“This explosive psychological 'sneaking' occurs when a woman suppresses large parts of self into the shadows of the psyche. In the view of analytical psychology, the repression of both negative and positive instincts, urges, and feelings into the unconscious causes them to inhabit a shadow realm. While the ego and superego attempt to continue to censor the shadow impulses, the very pressure that repression causes is rather like a bubble in the sidewall of a tire. Eventually, as the tire revolves and heats up, the pressure behind the bubble intensifies, causing it to explode outward, releasing all the inner content.<br />
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The shadow acts similarlyY We find that by opening the door to the shadow realm a little, and letting out various elements a few at a time, relating to them, finding use for them, negotiating, we can reduce being surprised by shadow sneak attacks and unexpected explosions.”<br />
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"A woman must be careful to not allow over-responsibility (or over-respectabilty) to steal her necessary creative rests, riffs, and raptures. She simply must put her foot down and say no to half of what she believes she "should" be doing. Art is not meant to be created in stolen moments only.”<br />
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“While archetypes may emanate through us for short periods of time, in what we call numinous experience, no woman can emanate an archetype continuously. Only the archetype itself can withstand such projections such as ever-able, all giving, eternally energetic. We may try to emulate these, but they are ideals, not achievable by humans, and not meant to be. Yet the trap requires that women exhaust themselves trying to achieve these unrealistic levels. To avoid the trap, one has to learn to say 'Halt' and 'Stop the music,' and of course mean it.”<br />
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“I hope you will go out and let stories, that is life, happen to you, and that you will work with these stories... water them with your blood and tears and your laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom.”<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-7925789038370497422015-04-23T12:15:00.000-04:002015-04-23T12:15:09.608-04:00Fall in Love with Your Dark Side<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers all,<br />
<br />
Why is it very often our self-love is inconsistent? Some days we love ourselves, some days we don't. When we are doing great and feeling great we are in love with ourselves. But when we make mistakes we become our worst critic.<br />
<br />
Let me tell you, no one is perfect. I am sure you already know this. We, humans, make mistakes, we hurt ourselves and others. Here's something we need to learn to understand - without one wouldn't be the other. If we didn't hurt we wouldn't know how to love, if we didn't make mistakes we wouldn't know how to make it right. There would be no day if we didn't have night. Everything in life has its opposite, for only because of its opposite it could be experienced.<br />
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So if you notice experiencing opposites to understand either one is really an essence of life. We couldn't feel happiness if we didn't know unhappiness. We couldn't be kind if we didn't know how to be unkind. We couldn't be compassionate if we didn't know how to be selfish. It literally applies to everything in life.<br />
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I know some might disagree and I expect it for without disagreement there would be no agreement :)<br />
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The point is, however, for us to see our dark side and fall in love with it too. If we only love ourselves for our positive qualities and don't accept the negative ones how could we call it love at all? It's half love, it doesn't exist. Love is absolute, it's all-inclusive.<br />
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Moreover when we reject our dark side, we reject it in others as well. What do you think happens when we do that? We get disappointed, frustrated, angry, annoyed. We were looking for an ideal, and alas met a real person. And since we all have a dark side, every person will disappoint us sooner or later.<br />
The purpose is to grow spiritually, and become wise. Before we see oneness we need to see separation. We need to accept bad and good before we can see that it's all one, just at the opposite spectrum of each other. Once we see this oneness, we learn to love completely.<br />
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So you'll ask me How do we fall in love with our dark side?<br />
First acknowledging that it's there in all of us. Sadly most of us are blue in our faces trying to prove our right all the time. If anyone mentions our negative qualities we get so consumed proving them wrong that we miss an important life lesson to pay attention and see what we need to do to make it right. Let's face it we all make mistakes and sometimes behave less than admirable. We all display jealousy, envy, selfishness, possessiveness, aggression, greed, et al - it's human nature. Just watch children and within one day you'll observe all those "negative" qualities. Of course, we need to grow up and behave like adults, but we also need to remember our nature and stop denying it in ourselves and others. The goal is to accept them (as an adult:) and see what we can do to move up their spectrum.<br />
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It was only when I started accepting my dark side was I finally able to fall in love with myself completely. I looked at my dark side from a loving place and as such was able to accept it and consciously move to its opposite. An amazing thing happens once I did that. I became more forgiving and accepting of others. It is so liberating to be accepting. It is as if pounds of weight came off and I felt light and free.<br />
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True, it's not as easy as accepting our good qualities. We had avoided our dark side since we were children, society conditioned us to hide our negative qualities and disapprove them in others. Now most people won't even admit (even to themselves) when they feel something that's considered "bad". We shut others down when they want to share their dark side. We run away from it like from plague.<br />
We need to stop, turn to it and accept it with love and patience.<br />
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It's a conscious responsibility to undo society's conditioning. Start small, start slow. Maybe one negative quality at a time. For instance, when realized how selfish ("negative" quality in our society) I could be I cried (tears of sorrow mixed with tears of relief). I meditated. With that came strength, and then came power to accept and turn to its opposite, which was compassion. A side note here, selfishness is healthy sometimes, and is needed when we have to stand up for our rights. So it's important to also see value in our "negative" qualities and then decide where to go from there. This post is, however, more about those negative qualities that keep us captive inside and inhibit our ability to live a healthy, happy and fulfilling life.<br />
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When we start accepting all of us, we begin to change. We start using our dark side to our advantage, and learn from it. As a result it becomes our friend not enemy, and we enter a state of harmony. And that's when we begin to create the life we truly want.<br />
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Namaste<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-63455779879898557582015-04-07T16:58:00.003-04:002015-04-08T22:56:47.497-04:00Magical state<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Hello my Goddesses,<br />
<br />
Today, I want to share with you one of the most magical states we woman should aspire to sustain if we want to lead a happy life and manifest our heart's desires.<br />
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Being a moon child that lives by a cycle, a woman is susceptible to constant emotional and physical changes. Just in one single day, a woman could go through a wide range of emotions, feelings, and physical states. And even though we are affected by outside factors, it's really our feminine nature that causes us to go through constant changes. Just to clarify, men don't go through constant changes as we are as they don't live by a moon cycle. As you learn to understand and go with a cycle, you'll become to appreciate it and see it as a true blessing from nature.<br />
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The first and most important step is to become aware of our feminine nature. It's not widely educated to us in our communities in this modern world, and most women are not even aware what's happening to them. I know, I've been there. Most of us go through a point in our lives when we think that something must be wrong with us. Sometimes we are too sensitive, too emotional, too indecisive, too irrational, too skeptical, too trusting... Another common scenario is to move from one mood to another in a NY minute, from happy to sad, from crying to laughing, from closeness to distance. There are days that we wouldn't be moved even if an Earthquake was happening. And then there are days, when one look from a lover could drive us up the wall, and turn us into a shrew. Some days we are pure sweetness and joy to be around, and others - we are impossible to deal with.<br />
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What a joy to be a woman :)<br />
But honestly, if we only learn how to go with our nature and use it to our advantage to have happy and fulfilling lives.<br />
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I spend 100% of my time trying to learn about myself and other women, understand our nature, and how to become best friends with it. First, there is no way around it. I know most of us are raised by strong mothers and fathers who tell us we should only rely on ourselves, get education, great jobs, make money, gain status. Our parents and societies tell us to be tough and strong. Feminists fought for us to have equal rights, to wear pants and be active.<br />
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How far have we come to have all we want? And yet, so far that we've forgotten the most important state a woman should sustain in order to align with her true nature and be a receiver of its gifts.<br />
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Not trying to test your patience here, just trying to evoke some critical thinking :)<br />
The state a woman should be in is harmony. She needs to be in harmony with her nature, those around her, and the world itself. It's when we sustain harmony on a daily basis that we are aligned with our nature and are able to manifest our desires. When a woman is in harmony, she becomes the light not only to herself but to those around and the world. She is full of energy. She is a source of life.<br />
Our only task in this life is to tune in and find harmony within. Once we do, we live authentically, we speak our truth, we walk our truth. Once we are aligned with our truth, we become creators.<br />
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How does a woman sustain peace and harmony in this crazy world of deadlines, and expectations?<br />
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We stop. We do less. We calm down. We become still, up to a point of passivity.<br />
Don't get me wrong, there will be times when we need to move and act fast. But those are rare when a woman gets aligned with her true nature. Just like nature itself, she needs not to hurry and yet everything gets done. We are catalysts of nature, never forget that.<br />
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When we spread ourselves thin we lose our energy, and when we are low on energy we can't manifest our desires and attract happy relationships. Woman's power is in her energy; and how she accumulates and spends it will indicate the quality of life she'll have. You can notice those women who are low on energy right away. It's almost as if all their juices were sucked out of them. Their skin looks pale and wilted, their movements are neurotic. They hurry and worry to compensate for the lower vibration inside. In such a state a woman can't create the life she wants and inspire others. And then there is a woman full of energy, she doesn't hurry. She is almost like a swan gliding on the lake in all of her glory. Her beauty shines from within and others are drawn to her. Things just come to her. The difference is that she knows how to sustain and spend her energy. Any woman could be a swan. I know I've experienced both of those states myself. I gave away my energy freely and was drained to a point that creation was out of reach. And I know what it feels like to be full of energy and when creating becomes effortless. It's every woman's choice which one she'd rather experience.<br />
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So how do we stop and fill ourselves with energy that will help us attract our deepest desires?<br />
First, by making a conscious decision. We need to become aware. Once you know that you are low on energy, you need to stop doing what you're doing and find ways to save it up. It's about setting boundaries with others and what's expected from you. It's about saying No. It's about listening to your body and giving it what it needs. It could be meditation, yoga practice, dance, walk in the park, a movement, or a soak in a tub. Your body will tell you what it needs and wants, just listen.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBIshz-lO3xnMy-5sml4i2c8C7HNOF8QKNi45BUM_s-KseDBxD4AjAIGPgNVglT7LWejTveZpkpy5NfgS_dwJr0TMJpcsKyNO4MvxeaIvymBxTZkGiy9sHSUiBA5UwzoTM0xze28BttjVK/s1600/moon_goddess.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBIshz-lO3xnMy-5sml4i2c8C7HNOF8QKNi45BUM_s-KseDBxD4AjAIGPgNVglT7LWejTveZpkpy5NfgS_dwJr0TMJpcsKyNO4MvxeaIvymBxTZkGiy9sHSUiBA5UwzoTM0xze28BttjVK/s1600/moon_goddess.jpg" height="400" width="307" /></a>It's about giving up action and letting things happen. We need to become comfortable spending time alone, even on weekends when everyone is out and about (especially in New York city where I live). We need to put our internal needs first, and if our body and soul wants us to stay home and paint or write, skip that party that will exhaust you even more and rob you of your creative energies. I can't stress enough how important it is to accumulate energy when a woman wants to attract the love of her life. It's not about running on dates every day and signing up for every dating site. It's about accumulating her energy and spending it wisely. The same principle applies to any creative idea or professional goal. We need to establish our priorities and become careful how we spend our energy. However, don't confuse it with laziness and depressing passivity. If a woman is aligned with her cycle, she is in a constant movement, she is always creating. It's all about the level of movement and receptivity.<br />
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I'll delve more into practical steps on how to save energy and spend it wisely in my future posts. For now just become aware of your vibration and see where you need to make changes. As always your own body is your best adviser. <br />
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Namaste<br />
<br /></div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-19518677661862383732015-04-06T12:49:00.001-04:002015-04-06T12:49:02.154-04:00How to fall in love with yourself fast<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
Let's say you're deeply aware that loving yourself is key to a happy life but still having difficulty sincerely loving yourself on a daily basis. All of it seems overwhelming, and sometimes you just don't know how to make a first step. Or you've been conditioned for so long to criticize yourself so when you make a mistake all that work spent on falling in love with yourself goes out the window. <br />
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Today, I am going to share with what I used to do myself in the early stages of developing self-love. I still use it once in awhile when I need a quick pick me up. But as you keep discovering true love inside you won't need it as much.<br />
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So here is my little secret on how to fall in love with yourself right now and fast:<br />
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Imagine you are your own daughter.<br />
Again I am addressing women here, since I can safely use tested knowledge derived from my personal feminine experience. If men want to try my methods, I would only encourage, but I am no expert on their psyche and would not guarantee any result.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYSeqxzfKuaiQ6Al8J45Uxxl9JT1mIriOf0FZEtr2aUSaTjfUV1K-5i7dYEFFWNLVkzGhpHLm7DHX0bWlINR_hqdVXh5rsDdees96sDezhRTpals1wGICSy3cUoosA9ERCGEPyoNF0_XLW/s1600/Inner+child.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYSeqxzfKuaiQ6Al8J45Uxxl9JT1mIriOf0FZEtr2aUSaTjfUV1K-5i7dYEFFWNLVkzGhpHLm7DHX0bWlINR_hqdVXh5rsDdees96sDezhRTpals1wGICSy3cUoosA9ERCGEPyoNF0_XLW/s1600/Inner+child.jpg" height="257" width="320" /></a>Again ladies, imagine you are your own daughter.You might be perplexed by this idea. What does it mean? It's quite simple actually if you just give it a try. Imagine you are your own beloved daughter (whether you have one or not). I personally don't have one, but as far back as my early 20s I was using this method to show myself love, especially when I felt down and needed something to pick me up quick.<br />
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Just think about it, if you are a woman and you have a daughter, she would probably be the most important person in your life. You'd love her unconditionally, give her only the best, want to see her happy and loved. There would be no limit how far you'd go show her your love.<br />
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So why not do that for yourself? Why not be your own daughter? The child inside you needs it, it's been waiting all along.<br />
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When I feel down or critical of myself, I just start imagining if I had a daughter and she were me, I would tell her that she is wonderful no matter what, that I love her no matter what, that I believe in her no matter what, that she is allowed to make mistakes, that she is a human but an amazing one, that everything will work out because it always does. That she has nothing to worry, cause I am by her side, and the Universe will support us at all times. That we have got each other and that's all we need. That we can get up and smile again, and see beauty in everything. That we are here to be happy and have joy. That we are just learning, and we are doing better and better every day. I could go on and on until my fingers can't type anymore. You get an idea.<br />
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I want to encourage every sister out there to treat herself with love and care, the way she would her one and only beloved baby girl.<br />
Your inner child will blossom and give you strength, and life to be happy about. Just give her love.<br />
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Blessings to all on this wonderful Monday morning.<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-32590764493488991652015-04-01T23:26:00.003-04:002015-04-01T23:26:17.028-04:00What Do Women Want<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers all,<br />
<br />
I haven't shared with you that since last Fall, I'd been feeling that something was missing in my life. I wasn't sure what or which area in my life exactly was lacking. So I started my search last December, which prompted me to read and go through a lot of material on feminine divine. I even started a female-only group where we would get together and share our deepest feelings and thoughts.<br />
<br />
I wanted to learn all I could about myself and other women. I was yearning to uncover my own feminine divine. In doing that, I started seeing divine in other women, even strangers on the street. I noticed how painful it was to be a modern woman; how much was missing in our lives. I could see how separated we'd become from our womanhood. How enwrapped we'd become in masculine energies foregoing our beautiful and natural feminine source. I started seeing that unless we go back to our nature and re-connect with our feminine divine we are doomed to lead a life that is not ours.<br />
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We were not taught that a life of a woman is full of joy and pleasure. It's about loving herself and others, it's about doing what she loves, it's about nurturing her body and soul, it's about uniting with other women and bringing each other up, it's about being the light to men and the world.<br />
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Most of all, it's about being true to her nature. And her nature is compassion, joy, love, happiness, peace, support, sensuality, unity, beauty, creativity, creation, and birth.<br />
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In a society we live now, we are expected to climb the corporate ladder, compete against men and even our sisters, look sexy, get married, keep up the appearances, make babies, go to work until the day of birth and go back after only 2 month on maternity. And then be a mother, a wife, an employee, a lover, a daughter, a coach, a healer, a fighter, a survivor, a householder.<br />
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I don't have to go on for you to see how crazy this life is for any human! So how is it we, feminine Goddesses, that came to this life to have joy and pleasure and create have ended up like this?<br />
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I don't have all the answers at the moment, I am in progress. All I know is that we need to end this craziness, and find our connection to feminine divine again. It's calling me, it's calling us. I feel it in my bones, in all of my cells and tissues.<br />
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We need to reclaim our right to be happy and enjoy the life that is in harmony with our authentic nature. We need to abandon a rat race that society imposed on us. We need to follow our hearts and move our bodies in a rhythm of our own cycle. We need to nourish our souls by doing what we love, and our bodies by giving them what they want.<br />
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The world needs us to awaken and re-connect with our Feminine Divine.<br />
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The Earth and life itself is crying for us to wake up and become aligned with our nature. Men need to see us reclaiming our source so that they can become the men they should be. And a true man is the one who achieves and provides to make his Goddess happy. He leads as in tango (more on that to follow!) protecting his woman and letting her just enjoy the dance, show her beauty, trust him, feel him, follow his lead. He came to this world to give her pleasure. And that's when she blossoms and gives him her love and support. When she feels safe she can open herself up and shine from within. When she feels secure she gives away of her natural gifts (love, support, compassion, healing, et al) freely. But a man needs a woman to show him the way by being true to herself. She needs to ignite her light and shine for him to see what his nature is. That's just the way it is. We are catalysts, and men need us to give them the light to see.<br />
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My lovely Goddesses, I'm reaching out to you with all my love and support. Let's find our truth, let's end this crazy marathon we believe we need to run, let's find our beauty and strength in being a woman.<br />
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If we want to fill that void and be happy, we need to re-connect with our Feminine Divine and start following its calling.<br />
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I know it's not easy to abandon our masculine energies. We've been wearing pants for too long (myself including), going back to our mothers, grandmothers. We've been told to rely only on ourselves. We've been conditioned to compete with others. We've been forsaken our feminine source.<br />
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Some women might disagree, I know I'd been there myself. But I am certain if every woman sits down. closes her eyes and looks within herself, she'll agree with everything I said. I saw it in my meditation, I heard a Universal Female voice.<br />
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So I want to start leading by example. I am giving up competition and embracing unity with others, I am letting go of control and becoming accepting, I am replacing financial goals with my heart's desires, I am embracing beauty and peace over stress and worry, I am letting a man be a man and myself be a woman.<br />
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I am aware it will take strength and courage to abandon the life style we've grown used to. But I choose to be happy, I chose to be true, I choose to inspire, I choose to lead.<br />
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Love and support to all my sisters. The time has come for us to be authentic, and find our place in this world again.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-82581332577667301092015-03-23T18:06:00.001-04:002015-03-23T18:06:06.159-04:00Devil is in the Detail, Self-Love<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
So many of us think that something grand has to happen for us to fall in love with ourselves: promotion, new business, big diamond engagement ring, losing weight, buying a house, graduating from a top school, buying a car, wearing designer brands, et al.<br />
<br />
The truth is it's an illusion. Once you get or become one of those so called "self-love inducers", there will be another one, and then another one, and... you get the point.<br />
<br />
So when do you fall in love with yourself?<br />
Starting now, and starting small.<br />
<br />
Did you ever notice how you look at yourself in the mirror? Do you give yourself a smile? Do you look at yourself and say I love you my feminine Goddess?<br />
If not, start right now. Be your own admirer.<br />
<br />
How about taking care of yourself (your hair, face, body, style) when you're alone? Do you tend to let yourself go when you are all by yourself. Am I seeing old worn-out clothes, dirty hair, and dull face?<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyqFSKRcDyDRss115HN3rCgyhLVGzCUvO9OgSw4BBjXqUN_beU2cMDbcDvWOkl2byQl1J5s99hKFhkYyBbtO5gKpyjOLbYVWSb_2h3sN8I4hL9U4UcDH_4sj_NssClSIJ6_Yotw5mjrsGn/s1600/bridget-jones-diary.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyqFSKRcDyDRss115HN3rCgyhLVGzCUvO9OgSw4BBjXqUN_beU2cMDbcDvWOkl2byQl1J5s99hKFhkYyBbtO5gKpyjOLbYVWSb_2h3sN8I4hL9U4UcDH_4sj_NssClSIJ6_Yotw5mjrsGn/s1600/bridget-jones-diary.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a><br />
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Well, the way we treat ourselves even when completely alone is also showing how we feel about ourselves. Taking care of ourselves is something we do to show love for ourselves and is independent of making an impression on others.<br />
Here's a fun exercise for all my sisters out there. Next time you're home alone, put on your sexy clothes, take care of your skin (masks, scrubs, moisturizer), let your sexy hair down, maybe curl your eye lashes (something I do as soon as I wake up, it gives a constant lift to my whole face, and no makeup needed), or spray your favorite perfume on (something I do even before I go to bed sometimes) to awaken your senses. Then when you go to bed, take a nice bath or a long shower, scrub yourself from neck to toes (every little toe attended), put sexy lingerie on, a silk slip, or anything that you'd put on if Bradley Cooper was in bed waiting for you. No need to do it every day; there are always pj and boy shorts nights. But do incorporate those nights when you go to bed as a true sex goddess.<br />
If you're single and all alone on a Saturday night and don't want to go to dinner by yourself, buy your favorite food (no cooking), serve it nicely, dress up, put makeup on and enjoy the best company in the world - You.<br />
Only truly self-loving people like to spend time alone. They always find time for themselves, and cherish it as something special. For they know the only person they need to make happy is themselves.</div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-69475890106479654832015-03-03T16:20:00.002-05:002015-03-09T12:20:45.940-04:00Self-Love Test<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
One thing I noticed is that most people can't tell if they truly love themselves or not. There seems to be a lot of confusion. Believe me I still find myself puzzled now and then, weighing ins and outs, studying, doing research.<br />
Here's what I learned, simply feeling good about yourself on most days isn't necessarily true love. Staring at yourself in the mirror and admiring what one sees isn't either. Neither is being cocky nor arrogant. Since we are on this subject, let's throw self-preservation in here as well.<br />
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True self-love is much more subtle. It's showing through how one talks about herself, how she walks, how she communicates with others, how she dresses, how she carries herself, how she reacts and behaves. When a woman has deep love for herself she is accepting of herself and others; she is aware that we are all different and are deserving of love. She doesn't judge, nor she covets what others have. She doesn't get upset if someone says something unpleasant about her. She doesn't care about others' opinions of herself. Again she is aware that we are all different and not everyone is approving of her. She loves and approves herself and that's all she needs. Even when she feels annoyed, scared, irritated, jealous, or even mad (and there are moments she does for she's a child of a moon, and goes through cycles), she's easy on herself. She knows it's a passing feeling, and it probably is just a little message for her to decipher regarding her own deep beliefs and desires. She is accepting of her emotions and feelings and she is wise about them. She will address them as they come, she will move on, she'll shine again and fill her heart with love. She doesn't harbor resentment or revenge; she is easy to forgive.<br />
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She doesn't need to prove anything to anyone, not even to her own parents and friends. She is giving of her love freely but will walk away if her values are compromised. She won't compete against others, she'll simply go after what she wants. She is comfortable saying Yes and No; she goes by her standards. She stands up for herself when that's the only choice; otherwise, she'll just walk away. For she knows that she's already got all she'd ever need.<br />
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So my restless hearts, how can one know if self-love is missing?<br />
Some of the tell-tale signs:<br />
1) one gets easily and often irritable/annoyed/angry with others. One thing is when there is a legitimate reason to get mad at someone (broken trust, undelivered promises, et al). Another is when one gets angry with everyone and everything. People who complain about neighbors, colleagues, bosses, others. Or those who get angry even with a server at the restaurant. You get the picture.<br />
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2) Comparing yourself to others. Again it's totally ok to see something others have and desire it for yourself. Another is to feel inferior, unimportant compared to others.<br />
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3) Putting up with people who mistreat us. It's normal to have conflicts with those around us. However, it's not when someone is not respectful of us on a consistent basis. Who walks all over us, who talks about us behind our backs, who doesn't align with our values. How about a woman taking man back after each time he hurt her...<br />
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I encourage all of us to be honest with ourselves and see which aforementioned areas need improvement. If there is a quality in someone that irritates us, ask yourself Why? Is it something I want? Is it something I don't accept in myself? Is there someone in your life who you need to let go? Is it time to surround yourself with people who inspire you, who respect you, who make you feel good?<br />
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Honesty with yourself is the first step. This is where magic happens. This is where healing can happen. This is where love can blossom.<br />
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Sending my love to you, giving it freely :)<br />
<br /></div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-35836132687261332092015-03-02T14:52:00.000-05:002015-03-03T17:10:19.536-05:00A story of one little raindrop<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
I often found myself fascinated watching raindrops' dance on the window of a driving car. If you pay attention, you'll notice how rain or snow breaks into a thousand tiny drops splattered all over the window giving us a natural sketch of Jackson Pollock's painting. As a car moves, those tiny drops start moving rapidly, some of them disappear into the air all on their own, some merge with others before leaving their short-lived life of a drop on a window into the unknown.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWl_CrLmyOoLHSPLD0WzQZ4w0lVtyaM2weeUqDOb2cj9P20e9XgvUPWGkw7GXfGSp4ne2J1TcXtxwCbXbqinmwAcXgwLFh7Hqr7enw43WTJjKv7nFYj0rItSy_zLKMoMAFG-efKtbiqq8X/s1600/raindrops.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWl_CrLmyOoLHSPLD0WzQZ4w0lVtyaM2weeUqDOb2cj9P20e9XgvUPWGkw7GXfGSp4ne2J1TcXtxwCbXbqinmwAcXgwLFh7Hqr7enw43WTJjKv7nFYj0rItSy_zLKMoMAFG-efKtbiqq8X/s1600/raindrops.jpg" height="250" width="400" /></a></div>
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Today as I was on the train, some melting snow from the top of the train was going through the same dance. Snow would melt into water, splatter over the window into a million drops, drops merging, dissolving into the air. And on and on. Something stroke me this time. Snow transforming into water, then a million drops, then evaporating into the air, then back into snow or rain, and so the cycle repeats itself eternally. For a little drop on the window life seems so fast and chaotic for it doesn't see beyond the window. When in fact, life never really ends, it simply changes its form. But how a tiny raindrop to know? It only sees the window and other fellow drops, merging together or not, disappearing into the unknown.<br />
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Isn't how we see our lives? They are short, fast and chaotic. But the truth is life never really ends, it simply changes its form. After our physical bodies evaporate, we go back to the source we came from before our bodies, just like drops of water. Life has no end, it has cycles. We are not able to see beyond the window we are dancing on but life is vast, it's ever transforming. Just like raindrops we evaporate into the energy that splattered us over this amazing world. We merge, we move, we disappear, only to come back again. Time on this planet Earth is just one of the cycles we go through. Then why be sad about leaving it when we merge with something so grand as the source of the Universe. Besides in another cycle we'll be dancing on the surface again. And so it goes.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-16647996991284043452015-02-20T16:40:00.001-05:002015-02-20T16:40:23.365-05:00Self-love, Embracing Your Feelings<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
As you know, most of my material is influenced by personal experience. Having ownership of what I share and teach is of utmost importance to me.<br />
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This is our second lesson on self-love, and there were a few ideas floating in my head to go with. But this week, as it often happens in life I was moved in a different direction. One morning, I found myself going through some pretty strong uncomfortable feelings, so uncomfortable that they resulted in physical pain. When it happened in the past, I'd have shut those feelings down, distracted myself, run away, done anything possible to avoid them. But the truth is we fool ourselves believing that by doing that we are serving ourselves right. Quite the opposite.<br />
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By ignoring our feelings, we are not accepting ourselves completely, we are not loving ourselves. In the end, we end up shutting ourselves down, not claiming our desires, not speaking our truth, and as a result not living our own lives. Over time, those repressed feelings will most likely result in diseases, broken relationships, career failures and ruined lives.<br />
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On our path to love, we must address every feeling with proper attention. There is a reason for every feeling going through us. They are there to show us what's desired, what's missing, what's needed. We came to this life to create, and our feelings are our most powerful messengers. If we relax and address them we'll see that they usually indicate something we are missing in our lives. Once we acknowledge that, we realize what it is we would like to create, and that sets the Universe in motion to bring it us. However if we suppress those feelings, we'll try to compensate with harmful behavior such as overeating, drinking, drug abuse, shopping, passive aggressive behavior towards others, and worst of all, hating ourselves.<br />
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Here's what happened to me: a few days ago I woke up feeling lonely. Yes, I know, you'll ask me how could you feel lonely when you always say how much you love your time alone, and your own company. And you're right, I do but there are moments in my life when I feel lonely and it's very human. Now, in the past I would try to distract myself with affirmations, work, gym, shopping, anything just not to feel that way. What I didn't realize back then was that by doing that I was setting myself up for a disaster. Instead of addressing that feeling of loneliness and seeking out connections with others (as that was what I was craving) I would shut myself down, sabotage relationships, avoid social events, and distance myself from others.<br />
Moreover, subconsciously I was recreating this scenario over and over again so that I would keep experiencing it all over again until I finally resolved it. This is what happens when we need to resolve a deep seated internal conflict, it will keep showing up in your life over and over again until resolved. Let me tell you, it took me many years of soul searching, self-development, help of other enlightened souls to realize this. But I finally did. And the truth was that I was the one causing this pain, and only I could help myself.<br />
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The first step was to acknowledge this feeling and accept it. This is where self-love steps in. When we love ourselves we accept everything we feel. And that's exactly what I did. I felt so much love forr myself that ignoring that feeling seemed almost rude and disregarding to me. So I embraced it completely and gave it my full attention. Truly amazing things happened after. First, I texted my partner (who was away on business) and told him how I felt, then I called my sister and my closest friend (Natasha thank you!). I shared with them how I felt and showed them my vulnerability. Like a wolf crying to the moon I embraced my loneliness and cried to others. They all responded to me with genuine love and care. As it turned out, my fears of being rejected for showing my vulnerability had no basis. In fact, people were happy to show me love and assure me I was not alone. As a result, the feeling of loneliness dissolved into thin air and a feeling of belonging took place. Incredibly, my relationships with others also became stronger and more authentic.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8Pw8USvkD9pyaXxc5phNzMjbFKtgx3TUQxg6sM2_vqbU6vIpO9bQroDd8DMlAbDH2gQyjp-L7mQcg7j57KefaSvrkbbzvWKORKFWQ96Nse3_mB5MWoD1RpJcacGXFSW08auMvPApBI2Su/s1600/woman+and+wolfe.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8Pw8USvkD9pyaXxc5phNzMjbFKtgx3TUQxg6sM2_vqbU6vIpO9bQroDd8DMlAbDH2gQyjp-L7mQcg7j57KefaSvrkbbzvWKORKFWQ96Nse3_mB5MWoD1RpJcacGXFSW08auMvPApBI2Su/s1600/woman+and+wolfe.jpg" height="320" width="229" /></a><br />
That was truly the first time I experienced the power of authenticity, and it's the most cherishing feeling we could have towards ourselves. The fist step was self-love.<br />
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I hope you can see how important it is to acknowledge your feelings, give them proper attention, find a way to address them and let yourself be happy. This is what self-love is.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-64005446391278992352015-02-02T18:44:00.003-05:002015-02-03T10:13:54.289-05:00Loving Yourself, Lesson 1<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers All,<br />
<br />
I'm excited to start a series on self-love. If you recall when I started this blog almost 4 years ago, the mission was to find true love in a big city. After 2 years of searching, exploring, and finally letting go I realized that the love I was looking for was inside me all along. A few months after that revelation, I found myself meeting and falling in love with my current partner. It's been 2 years since, and we are more in love than ever.<br />
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I know from personal experience that loving yourself must come first though. What's really interesting is that back then I thought I loved myself... But the truth was I lied to myself. It was a gradual process of opening up and seeing the truth. First I became my own best friend, encouraging and believing in myself, becoming my own biggest fan. Finally I felt utter love and acceptance within. It was blissful. I stopped looking outside of myself, for everything I needed I already had. Some people disappeared from my life, but more people came in. The world turned its most magical colors on.<br />
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I can't say that I never experienced that love before. I did but it would always be conditional. If I loved what I created in my life I would love myself back. If I didn't - no love. It was tough love. As such I was getting mixed results when it came to creating my life. It was similar to economical cycles: ups and downs. Sometimes I would feel on top of the world, sometimes all the way at the bottom.<br />
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Although life cycles are inevitable, the way we respond and deal with them is influenced by how we feel about ourselves. When we love and accept ourselves, any problem is viewed as a welcoming opportunity to expand and grow. We believe that the Universe loves us and is on our side. Things simply work out for the best. And when we don't it seems as if everything is against us.<br />
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As it happens in life, I wasn't always capable of sustaining that blissful state. There would be moments when I would feel insecure and undeserving. But because the foundation was already there, I was always able to bring myself back. Even during the darkest hour of the soul, the love within would light my heart and bring me back. I must admit it even saved my current relationship several times before I realized that all I had to do was to keep loving myself. Whenever I was unhappy with myself or the life I created it would reflect in my relationships, and my partner would mirror back to me my insecurities.<br />
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It wasn't till the day we almost walked away from each other that I realized the reason was my lack of self-love. I turned back to myself again, the light of love filled my heart and lit my face once again. As a result a relationship with my partner recovered and blossomed again. From that moment on it became my mission to look withing first and see what's missing. Whenever I am triggered to blow up and look for validation outside, now I simply turn inside, acknowledge my inner yearning, and give myself love. Everything else works out magically.<br />
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And this is how once again I was reminded that self-love should be a beacon of our existence. Naturally, I wanted to share and inspire others who needed it. <br />
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Besides by exploring this subject we dig deeper and learn more. Learning about ourselves and falling in love with ourselves is a lifetime process. For we are never the same, we are forever changing and growing. Love needs to adapt, it needs to grow in tandem.<br />
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But enough, lets get to business!<br />
The first lesson on self-love has been inspired by my favorite New York gals. We live in such a driven society here where being busy is not only necessary but admired. Always on the go (even when there is no real need for it), there is little time left to direct focus on ourselves and simply enjoy our own company. With never-ending deadlines at work, almost daily visits to the gym and dinners with girlfriends, we sacrifice our time to relax and give ourselves pleasure. But in order for a woman to be happy, she needs to have pleasure in her life.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsisoUMGCVHOPkZu4lQsbjhElHLrgd5-cUwylNBoNnLu7_JV7c3ciHchyFcrM68ro8ff2ADfeswhp2yfgLQSXicdP7qiIrPesFGEnRB-ouuM55CHdNhIojzAhIvTRd9nEFhA79jYkIurxq/s1600/Overworked+woman-pic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsisoUMGCVHOPkZu4lQsbjhElHLrgd5-cUwylNBoNnLu7_JV7c3ciHchyFcrM68ro8ff2ADfeswhp2yfgLQSXicdP7qiIrPesFGEnRB-ouuM55CHdNhIojzAhIvTRd9nEFhA79jYkIurxq/s1600/Overworked+woman-pic.jpg" height="202" width="320" /></a>I believe every New York woman during crunch time at work (which is most of the time) follows the following routine: working a 10-14 hour day without a break, eating at her desk, not going outside to get some fresh air, eating junk, eating late and unconsciously, not getting enough sleep, surviving on coffee, putting on whatever she sees in the morning (and probably the same clothes every other day), and basically giving herself up completely to meet someone else's deadlines. The moment she gets to look in the mirror she starts seeing everything that's wrong: pale and dull skin, nails in bad shape, extra pounds on her hips, sad and exhausted frame overall. Almost like a sweater that's been worn too many times and now needs proper cleaning.<br />
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So what do we do. How do we show ourselves love?<br />
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1) First, take it easy. Don't be hard on yourself for eating too much sweets and not exercising. I am a victim to my draw filled with chocolate goodness. So what? I just tell myself, it's ok. I ate too much candy today. I will stop now and eat an apple and that's all there is to it. I love myself. I know I can do better, and I will. But for now, that's what's happened and I understand I needed some extra sweetness in this cold hectic office full of exhausted and crazy people. I'll go home, skip my dinner and do 1.5 hour yoga. Tomorrow I will stop at Whole Foods and buy a bunch of fresh yummy fruit. I deserve it.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-jsMe_PqKSLgSa5aZ7L3lqfxGF9NKBBxkEjYUzjfVHV-UP94CqJWlApiFArgmCn2GYl6pQJpKhU29a928dqpUcj8Sh32Tw-LRJiaQ8gAk4q4_t1LTBpx8PhzlWJFE1JddxHQFZnhz1YwE/s1600/Office-Meditation.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-jsMe_PqKSLgSa5aZ7L3lqfxGF9NKBBxkEjYUzjfVHV-UP94CqJWlApiFArgmCn2GYl6pQJpKhU29a928dqpUcj8Sh32Tw-LRJiaQ8gAk4q4_t1LTBpx8PhzlWJFE1JddxHQFZnhz1YwE/s1600/Office-Meditation.jpg" height="320" width="239" /></a>Note: You see what I did here? I was gentle with myself, I was loving. As a result I came up with a wonderful plan to get off that processed sugar trap and nourish my senses with fresh and nutritious food.<br />
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2) Second, I stop sacrificing all my time to work. I find little breaks here and there to find pleasure. I go out to get some nice organic coffee. I walk over to my colleague and have a lovely chit chat about fashion and travel. I take my phone and flip through some pictures of my kitty. I text something sweet to my honey. I pull out my journal and scribble my dreams for 10 minutes.<br />
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Note: Again I find time to nourish my soul. I love my soul and want to give it some attention. Small things go long way here.<br />
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3) Multitasking. I find ways to take care of myself at any time.<br />
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I stand up and stretch as I look for some files or need to print something out. I spray Rose Water on my face as I am drafting another email. I snatch my file as I go to the bathroom and give my nails a quick touch-up. I squeeze my kegel muscle any time during the day, I put on earphones and turn on Nina Simone, I listen to the inspirational people when my work doesn't require stellar focus. I leave at a decent hour, and login from home. Now I can put a face mask on, make a cup of oolang tea and still meet my deadline.<br />
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Note: I find ways to develop and grow from inside out. Work on myself won't be at expense of other work. As a result I feel nourished and taken care of even when most of time is spent in the office. I radiate calm and happiness. Colleagues cool down around me.<br />
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4) Getting enough sleep. Above all I make sure to get a good night sleep. As soon as I leave office, my mind is focused on me, and giving myself pleasure. Even if I only have 1 hour before bed, I'll spend it on me. I'll light a candle, have some tea, listen to jazz, cuddle with my partner, take a nice shower, put fresh underwear on, and snuggle under the covers.<br />
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Note: I could be tired but I feel loved. I know I've done all I could to show and give myself love. My lover and my kitty feel it and mirror it back to me.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-71681439360682384172015-01-28T20:55:00.000-05:002015-01-28T20:55:11.818-05:00Self-Love<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
It's been awhile since I wrote about self-love. But life keeps bringing me back to this subject as more and more I am convinced that self-love is a doorway to a happy and fulfilled life.<br />
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Recently, I've been going through some serious soul searching as I found myself stuck in an emotional rut. Something had to change and that's how I was brought back to this subject.<br />
It just happens that loving ourselves is one of the most difficult things to do. Either we were raised to think it was selfish to love yourself or society dictates norms that make us feel inadequate. Instead of deeply loving ourselves we consistently choose criticism, self doubt, insecurity.<br />
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Here is some truth about life. It mirrors back to us whatever we believe of ourselves. So if we don't think we are worthy the Universe will mirror it back to us in others sharing this belief. Relationships with others are reflections of our relationship with ourselves. And it's not some high level new age nonsense. Just look around you, and if you're honest with yourself (which I realize is not an easy thing to do sometimes) you'll see the exact relation. It's all out there mirroring back to us whatever we believe ourselves to be.<br />
By analyzing myself and working with other women I also learned to believe that most issues or conflicts (be it professional, personal, etc.) we have is a result of not loving ourselves.<br />
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It might be hard to believe for some at first. But it's really a very simple psychological exercise. For instance, a woman who can't lose weight after many attempts is a clear sign of lack of self-love. A woman (I'll use a woman as my example since women are my main audience) who loves herself would simply not eat certain foods that are not aligned with her image of herself. She would take care of her body by feeding it nutritious healthy meals, by listening to her body. Even if she indulges (and she does as she likes to pleasure herself) she feels good about it. She savors every single piece of that chocolate or cake instead of feeling guilty. And guess what, the biochemistry is very sensitive to how we feel. It responds to our emotions about the food we eat in how it metabolizes that food. Again it's all about loving ourselves and trusting our bodies to tell us what they want and need.<br />
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Another example is being in a relationship with an unavailable partner. It is a reflection of us not believing that we deserve to be in a happy and healthy relationship. The source again is lack of self-love.<br />
I could go on and on. Just trust me that most our pain is from not loving ourselves enough. <br />
<br />
Then we meet a woman who is confident in her own skin, and everything seems to be working for her. She is respected at work, adored by her man, and attracts attention almost anywhere she goes. You probably already know what I'm going to say next. Yes, this woman loves herself. She loves every part of herself from inside out, and the world mirrors that back to her.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimNFiY8x9XSujilJWl6vETx8pm6yejJ1SbNFukjey9qwaokoszFbwrUn2a6kRB-ODXWV2wcW7m8GXjI9JOY3PhJAwQVZ6c5f2hFcr9DkKcKvdPlk8OokPoYWmYBnfdtkt9d3mAtfXR67u7/s1600/Free+Woman.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimNFiY8x9XSujilJWl6vETx8pm6yejJ1SbNFukjey9qwaokoszFbwrUn2a6kRB-ODXWV2wcW7m8GXjI9JOY3PhJAwQVZ6c5f2hFcr9DkKcKvdPlk8OokPoYWmYBnfdtkt9d3mAtfXR67u7/s1600/Free+Woman.jpg" height="320" width="204" /></a>The most interesting thing is we are born with self-love, it's the most natural feeling. Children love themselves and give their love away freely. In return, they are adored by people. Then parents, kindergartens, schools, adults start conditioning them, and slowly but steadily children learn that there is something wrong with them. As years roll, we find ourselves in a snow ball of reasons not to love ourselves. We struggle to have loving relationships, getting acknowledged at work, and getting the life we truly want.<br />
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I want to dive deep in this subject, find ways to release limiting beliefs and fall madly in love with ourselves. I will share my thoughts and findings with you my lovers. I want us all to awaken the love for ourselves we were born with and have the life we want.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-35925722906289121792014-12-04T17:19:00.001-05:002014-12-04T17:19:50.592-05:00Where there is storm there is calm<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
Relationships are very much like an ocean. They go through stages, from playful and loving to wild and stormy. Sometimes they stand still, only to get wild and crazy again. Just like an ocean, they are affected by both internal and external factors.<br />
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We are happy when they are fun and playful, we are content when they are calm and serene, and we are in pain when they are stormy and unpredictable.<br />
<br />
But changes are unavoidable. No matter how solid and healthy a relationship might be, there will be a time when it will enter a shaky ground. It will go through a storm. It will shake us and throw us out of the boat, will slap us with cold water, will make us forget everything else. But just like an ocean, it will calm down, it will come still again.<br />
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As with any storm, there are two outcomes, it will either bring us down to the bottom of the ocean or throw us safely to the shore.<br />
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It all depends on how strong a relationship is, and how resilient two people are to withstand the storm. I am sure there are many other factors but they all fall under those two.<br />
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How to survive the storm and make it safely to the shore? The answer might not be obvious but it's always there. It resides in our heart. The heart knows whether it wants to be with the partner or now; it knows what to say and do to save a bond. It also knows whether it's time to let go.<br />
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So often we try to defend ourselves, prove ourselves right and a partner wrong. But who is there to know who's right and who's wrong. We are all different and no two persons on Earth will always agree on everything. Why would we even want that? The beauty is in variety. How wonderful is it to explore another human being, and just realize how unique we all are.<br />
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All relationships go through disagreements and tensions. But if we are open to see that we are all different and respect each other in our own way, they don't have to be defining.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyuCq2Ypq-8ZrfRnvEtPLtRIATaNvM5TM2HqWDEQXHTYWNuhiUTFepXvZq9XB5Yxagwu1St1dEnxA4LTpnjwEPoRyMhVGVun5T3W7DchDmW76v9mnk-A9V7-j-NYHS8MnuqUzFUxleeH3A/s1600/love+dogcat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyuCq2Ypq-8ZrfRnvEtPLtRIATaNvM5TM2HqWDEQXHTYWNuhiUTFepXvZq9XB5Yxagwu1St1dEnxA4LTpnjwEPoRyMhVGVun5T3W7DchDmW76v9mnk-A9V7-j-NYHS8MnuqUzFUxleeH3A/s1600/love+dogcat.jpg" height="320" width="229" /></a></div>
So the question we should really ask ourselves every time we go through difficulties in our relationships is Are we loving enough to honor them and see the other side?<br />
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Namaste<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-25017744617224119892014-09-26T17:44:00.002-04:002014-09-26T17:44:33.177-04:00Negative Thoughts<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Negative thoughts... Oh how I love you.<br />
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It hasn't always been the case. There was a time when I despised you, when I ran away from you like the plague. You scared me, you terrified me. Little did I know how helpful you were. How you held the answers I was looking for. How you wanted to guide me.<br />
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Why do you get such a bad rep? Why does the spiritual community give you undeserved blasphemy?<br />
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You are not what most people think of you. You are unrecognized angels.<br />
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We are taught to push away any negative thought if we want to be happy. But can we really do it? Can we truly be happy if we just push uncomfortable thoughts aside without resolving them? Isn't it like pushing dirt under furniture to clear an open space? No matter how clean that space is the dirt will be piling up under the covered areas, until it spills out and all over us.<br />
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That's what we do with our minds when we push any negative thought without giving it proper attention. Our minds get cluttered, even trashed with all unresolved thoughts or feelings. Can we surely assume it all leads to potential disasters?<br />
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What are you then, negative thoughts? and what should we do with you?<br />
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I like to think of you as little children. You are capricious but wise, you're cruel but honest, you're treacherous but loving. You drive us crazy but you also challenge us to open our hearts. You tell us when we go off our paths.<br />
I like to treat you as a child. I like to open my heart to you and understand why you are here in my life and what is it that you want. I like to give you proper attention without surrendering. I need to show you that you don't own me, but you have my attention. I see that you are here because there is a fear or unresolved desire. I know that if I just look at you and give you love, and tell you that I accept you, you'll stop your tantrum. I know if I see that you are scared and just want my assurance, you'll calm down. And I am sure if I address your concern or desire you will stop crying and will run happily away to wherever you came from.<br />
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Negative thoughts to positive thoughts are like nighttime to daytime. If there were no nighttime, there wouldn't be daytime. They are mirrors of each other, and simply wouldn't exist without each other. They are yin yang.<br />
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They need your attention. They need your love. But just like with everything we love, we need to give them love and set them free. They don't belong to us, and no one belongs to them.<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-86206227753666468442014-09-17T23:16:00.002-04:002014-09-17T23:36:23.148-04:00Pure Thoughts, Pure Love<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers.<br>
<br>
Did you know that thoughts could kill love just as much as actions would?<br>
<br>
There is a whole big world inside of us. It holds all our thoughts, feelings, emotions going back as far as we can imagine, and transcending our time reality. Just because it is not a part of our physical world and we can't see it or touch it, it does not make it any unreal. In fact, it is the only real world there is. We don't have a chance to pre-think or pre-feel inside of us, although we do that all the time in our physical world. We think before we say, we filter our feelings before we show them, we pretend, we put masks on, we lie.<br>
In our internal world, we simply couldn't do that. It happens as it happens, instantly, definitely. We may try to suppress some thoughts and feelings, but it's all after the fact.<br>
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So as you see, the world inside us is the only world that is authentic to us. It's our truth. The physical world is a playground, no more no less.<br>
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Did you notice what you've been thinking about lately? Did you consciously stop and acknowledge every thought and feeling that entered your mind?<br>
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Humans we are, we don't bother to acknowledge what is happening inside of us. We are too preoccupied with our appearances. We put too much emphasis on how we appear to others. We foolishly ignore the inside world by entirely focusing on the physical one.<br>
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We know those people who seem perfect on the outside, but we don't feel comfortable around them. They look shiny and pretty, but we feel discomfort being around them. Then there are people, who seem rather simple looking, and yet we love being around them. We open our hearts to them, we share our deepest secrets with them.<br>
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It's the internal world inside each person that others feel. We are energy and respond to energy. Just like radio, we tune in to the waves that each one of us transmits by their thoughts and feelings.<br>
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If we connected events that took place in our lives to our thoughts and feelings instead of our actions, we'd be able to see a much clearer and definite connection.<br>
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So how does it work in a relationship you ask me? The answer is simple it's our internal world that will determine a course of a relationship.<br>
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For instance, a woman might be nice and sweet to her lover, but inside her heart there is fear and distrust. Her partner will appreciate her sweetness in action but will feel uncomfortable around her. There will be that nagging feeling that something is just not right. We can't fool our partner's heart. The heart doesn't see what she does, it feels the energy coming from her heart. And eventually, her partner will feel uncomfortable around her up to the point that he'll start avoiding her, and break a relationship.<br>
On the other hand, if a woman has pure thoughts and feeling about her partner, her heart will send welcoming and loving energy towards him. His heart will feel home, and he'll be attached to a woman on a spiritual level. And here's the secret most women don't know. A man will stay with a woman he is spiritually connected with. All other connections (physical, intellectual, emotional) are ever-changing, always fickle. And it's only through their spiritual connection partners will be able to keep love alive.<br>
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I know sometimes we feel negative thoughts about our partner. And it's important to realize that it's normal. We shouldn't push those thoughts deep down or ignore them. It's as if we just cover our wound without treating it. We need to give those thoughts proper attention.<br>
But how do we balance them with loving thoughts to keep relationship alive?<br>
I'll talk about it in my next post. <br>
<br>
Namaste.<br>
<br>
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-30356358965179493942014-07-30T16:59:00.000-04:002014-08-05T15:33:11.878-04:00Finding ourselves in a relationship<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers lovers,<br />
<br />
Being in a relationship is going through the best and the worst of times we might experience in this physical life. Truly nothing can compare to the happiness we feel by loving and being loved. On the other hand, the pain that comes with it is the most excruciating. Through a relationship with another we are able to learn about ourselves something that could never come to light otherwise. We are challenged to reveal our deepest layers, show our true colors, and create new ones. It's about abandoning oneself only to find our other self though another. It's the most revealing spiritual journey we embark on. <br />
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Naturally, it is easy for a conflict between oneself and the other self we experience through another to develop. The oneself that is only defined by us as one person will fight the other self that becomes identified with another human being. It will fight for its freedom, space, choices. It will ally with our ego and tell us that we need to save our identity, we need to protect ourselves. It will scream to us to beware of the other, that it might tear us apart and break our hearts. It will sabotage our sincerest inspirations towards the other, to let our guards down, to open our hearts and souls. It will do anything to preserve its oneness.<br />
<br />
We all experience this internal conflict at a certain point in our relationships, and not necessarily romantic ones. It could be relationships with friends, lovers, partners, children, parents, maybe even pets for some. <br />
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What happens then? We sabotage our relationships, we end them, we break them, we leave them. But the worst is when we don't even realize we are doing it. We separate ourselves from a relationship and put all blame on the relationship itself. While the real cause is within ourselves. And guess what? Since it is within us it will re-appear in the next relationship, and then next, and next. And could be forever or until we become aware. <br />
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How to break this self-destroying cycle? First, is to identify it. It's not always easy for us to shut down our egos, and accept the painful truth about ourselves. Who wants to believe that we sabotage a loving relationship in order to be alone? Whatever the reason was that led us to preserving ourselves (childhood, bad experiences in the past, society) it needs to be revealed. It will be evading and fighting to come light, but it is necessary to win this battle in order to heal this part of oneself.<br />
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Then, we need to fall in love with ourselves all over again, more precisely with the self that is experienced through the other. This love will heal our wounded parts, and will make us feel safe to open up to another. It will create a loving and nurturing space for the love between two people to blossom and grow. It will become the foundation for many beautiful creations manifesting in a relationship. It will take people in a relationship much higher and further than they would reach on their own.<br />
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We all have a choice to let ourselves grow in a relationship or follow our old patterns and keeping our hearts closed.<br />
<br />
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Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7549704022073544930.post-6521810178303916902014-06-19T17:32:00.001-04:002014-06-19T17:32:24.551-04:00Babies R'nt Us<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Cheers all,<br />
<br />
So just as soon as I embarked on a journey to find my true path I was cornered by my mother and sister about having a child. They pushed me to the wall, pressed the gun to my uterus and demanded I have a baby right Now.<br />
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Apparently I am running out of time to join the most exclusive club of motherhood. With every minute celebrating my glorious 30s, I am wasting my life away (according to my mom and my sister).<br />
<br />
Well that just pisses me off. Isn't it every woman's right to decide what she wants to do with her life? Why are we still marginalized by the society into making us believe that the only way a woman makes a difference in this world is by procreating. Why those of us who don't participate in increasing the already overcrowded planet are looked at with pity at best?<br />
<br />
Why are we still alienated by our own lot (women) for not joining them in what sometimes seems to be a very disappointing and stressful experience?<br />
<br />
Just because some women find their purpose in having children doesn't mean others do.<br />
<br />
What about those women who are more conscious about responsibilities motherhood entails. We understand that bringing a child to this world isn't just a bow to our feminine nature. We actually think about the world we would have to bring a new life into, and how it's not the ideal world for a new life. We think about how most food these days is processed, toxic or genetically engineered, and obesity among kids is growing. We think about the polluted air and water, and melting arctic ice. We think how the corporation is controlling our lives. We think of all the civil wars taking place in the world. We think how corrupted our government is. We don't trust our society anymore.<br />
Then we stress about our jobs that only give 60 days of maternity leave, and there is no reliable and affordable day care available. We get anxious just thinking about leaving our child with some stranger at a day care, and run to work to be able to pay for it. Then we worry that having a child will put our career at risk, just because it does.<br />
We realize that we don't have "the whole village" to raise a child, we only have ourselves, and if we are lucky a reliable partner. <br />
<br />
If anything we are more responsible and practical about motherhood, and are fully aware whether we are ready to bring a new life into this world or not.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKvx8P6O3l1YQkwxEBNpnAeDBjul_AhXO8YTZAiJqMTXl3oe3Uof4V2GhLXYcVkPeiF2sg8YaA3BMZ2M-CDswHaT26esHK_l_2FmhTwfVmJyZH4LkwjbuqSyDLkjSYJfIBg0wZ_zQH7rqP/s1600/baby+girl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKvx8P6O3l1YQkwxEBNpnAeDBjul_AhXO8YTZAiJqMTXl3oe3Uof4V2GhLXYcVkPeiF2sg8YaA3BMZ2M-CDswHaT26esHK_l_2FmhTwfVmJyZH4LkwjbuqSyDLkjSYJfIBg0wZ_zQH7rqP/s1600/baby+girl.jpg" height="271" width="320" /></a>I am not saying that having a child is completely out of the question for me and other women of my generations. But we are not driven by primal instincts, and when or if we decide to have a child it will be a deliberate decision based on weighted options and solid reasons, and the God's will of course.<br />
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<br />
<br /></div>
Sashahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07990761872255700493noreply@blogger.com3