Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Self-Love

Cheers lovers,

It's been awhile since I wrote about self-love. But life keeps bringing me back to this subject as more and more I am convinced that self-love is a doorway to a happy and fulfilled life.

Recently, I've been going through some serious soul searching as I found myself stuck in an emotional rut. Something had to change and that's how I was brought back to this subject.
It just happens that loving ourselves is one of the most difficult things to do. Either we were raised to think it was selfish to love yourself or society dictates norms that make us feel inadequate. Instead of deeply loving ourselves we consistently choose criticism, self doubt, insecurity.

Here is some truth about life. It mirrors back to us whatever we believe of ourselves. So if we don't think we are worthy the Universe will mirror it back to us in others sharing this belief. Relationships with others are reflections of our relationship with ourselves. And it's not some high level new age nonsense. Just look around you, and if you're honest with yourself (which I realize is not an easy thing to do sometimes) you'll see the exact relation. It's all out there mirroring back to us whatever we believe ourselves to be.
By analyzing myself and working with other women I also learned to believe that most issues or conflicts (be it professional, personal, etc.) we have is a result of not loving ourselves.

It might be hard to believe for some at first. But it's really a very simple psychological exercise. For instance, a woman who can't lose weight after many attempts is a clear sign of lack of self-love. A woman (I'll use a woman as my example since women are my main audience) who loves herself would simply not eat certain foods that are not aligned with her image of herself. She would take care of her body by feeding it nutritious healthy meals, by listening to her body. Even if she indulges (and she does as she likes to pleasure herself) she feels good about it. She savors every single piece of that chocolate or cake instead of feeling guilty. And guess what, the biochemistry is very sensitive to how we feel. It responds to our emotions about the food we eat in how it metabolizes that food. Again it's all about loving ourselves and trusting our bodies to tell us what they want and need.

Another example is being in a relationship with an unavailable partner. It is a reflection of us not believing that we deserve to be in a happy and healthy relationship. The source again is lack of self-love.
I could go on and on. Just trust me that most our pain is from not loving ourselves enough.

Then we meet a woman who is confident in her own skin, and everything seems to be working for her.  She is respected at work, adored by her man, and attracts attention almost anywhere she goes. You probably already know what I'm going to say next. Yes, this woman loves herself. She loves every part of herself from inside out, and the world mirrors that back to her.

The most interesting thing is we are born with self-love, it's the most natural feeling. Children love themselves and give their love away freely. In return, they are adored by people. Then parents, kindergartens, schools, adults start conditioning them, and slowly but steadily children learn that there is something wrong with them. As years roll, we find ourselves in a snow ball of reasons not to love ourselves. We struggle to have loving relationships, getting acknowledged at work, and getting the life we truly want.

I want to dive deep in this subject, find ways to release limiting beliefs and fall madly in love with ourselves. I will share my thoughts and findings with you my lovers. I want us all to awaken the love for ourselves we were born with and have the life we want.



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